Parenting Points

Our current world is on edge. Division, finger pointing, and demonizing fill our news feeds. The only thing that we can agree on is our propensity to see our view as 100% correct and our opponent’s view as utterly flawed. We choose teams, draw lines, and feel justified in defending our opinion because we are clearly right. As Christians, many of us have jumped headfirst into the pool of division without even considering what being a witness of God’s kingdom could look like.

In the middle of conflict, the Apostle Paul’s frequent words to his readers, “grace and peace,” ring out as a Gospel witness in the middle of a broken world. In this simple greeting used throughout Paul’s New Testament letters, he gives the churches he shepherds a picture of kingdom realities we as Christians should be seeking to embody. We may have become so lost in the moment’s drama that we forgot the kingdom we are called to represent as Jesus’ followers. Here are two things to remember.

1. As people of grace, we begin by remembering where we would be without grace. We are not better than others because we have received grace, but we have been invited to be givers of grace to others. As we extend grace, we realize that seats of judgment are not ours to take. We seek to lead with love. We assume people’s best intentions and seek to meet them where they are. As we model grace, we point to Jesus, who embodied grace to the point of giving His life.

2. As people of peace, we seek to bring people together at a common table. If you peer beyond the headlines, we are all humans seeking to make it through life the best we can. Peacemakers seek to be leaders in conversations that bring about a better world through collaboration. As we seek peace, we can truly see the beauty in diversity that God has made in people made in His image.

What could it look like for your family to be a beacon of light shining grace and peace into our divided world? Your family could be willing to become a place where people are welcomed with love and grace, where best intentions are assumed, and where honest conversations can happen as people made in the image of God can bring about a better world that may look a little more like God’s kingdom.

-Dr. Ben Birdsong 

Missions Minister at Christ Church Birmingham

Writer and Speaker

www.benbirdsong.com 

Parenting Points

The countdown is on, and summer is just around the corner. Students anticipate the break from school. Parents long for a change of pace. And everyone just needs some sun, warm weather, and a change of scenery.

The author of Ecclesiastes writes, “for everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven” (Ecclesiastes 3:1 ESV). The author then goes on to list seven more verses of different moments and experiences that each happen in their own time. As you prepare and plan times for the summer season, here are three things to consider making moments of time to experience.

1. People. Relationships with other people matter and your family’s life will be strengthened by connections to others. Do you know the other families on your street? Who are people with which your family has lost connection? Do you have an old neighbor that moved or a relative that lives out of town? Who are some people in need around you who your family can serve? Could you be intentional to meet and build a friendship with someone from a different culture or race? 

2. Places. Alabama is blessed with many small towns which each have their own different charm and experience. What if your family took a day trip to a small town? What if you went on a family hike to a new place? What if your family went out to eat at a local restaurant in a different part of town? Trips to places do not have to be expensive or far away.

3. Lessons and Stories. With school on break for summer, you have a great opportunity to teach your kids something new. What is a story from the Bible that you can share with your kids that they may not have heard before? Have you shared your own testimony with your kids about God’s faithfulness in your life? Have your children heard stories from their grandparent’s childhood and life experiences? What is a new hobby that your family can learn together?

As we anticipate a change in pace and seasons, let’s be intentional to maximize our summertime by looking for people, places, lessons, and stories that can help our family make the most of the time.

-Dr. Ben Birdsong 

Missions Minister at Christ Church Birmingham

Writer and Speaker

www.benbirdsong.com 

Parenting Points

One of the most important days on the Christian calendar is Easter. We remember the resurrection of Jesus from the dead and celebrate the truth that without it, Paul reminds us, “our preaching is in vain and our faith is in vain” (1 Corinthians 15:14 ESV). If the resurrection and remembering the resurrection are essential, how do we pause, reflect, and engage with this good news?

In some church traditions, people have used the church calendar to connect to the story of the Bible more deeply. Though this may be foreign to you and your past church experience, your family could pause to engage with the message of Easter by observing the season of Lent.

What is Lent? Lent is a 40-day time beginning with Ash Wednesday (March 2) and ending with the Thursday before Easter (April 14). It is modeled after Jesus’ time of fasting in the desert found in the Gospels, where He set aside time to seek God and grow deeper in His relationship with the Father.  Lent is intended to be a time of reflection and grief about our sin and the brokenness of our world. This season is broken by the great celebration of Easter with a resurrected Jesus who conquered sin and death and will come again to make “all things new” (Revelation 21:5 ESV).

How would pausing for Lent strengthen my family’s faith? Taking time to pause would allow your family to seek to connect with God in this season intentionally. As Jesus went to the desert to commune with God, we create a place of desert in our own lives and families. We give up some things to create a space for God to speak to us and for us to commune with Him. We choose to adjust our family priorities for a season to remember our need for God and to prepare to celebrate God’s great rescue of us. 

What are some practical ideas on how to celebrate Lent? As a family, decide something that you will give up to connect more deeply with God. You could give up the extra TV show, desserts at dinner, or get up a few minutes early to add a family prayer time or Bible study. There are also several family Lent devotionals online which may be helpful.

In this season of preparation, let us journey into the wilderness to be reminded of who we are, our need for God’s grace, and experience the power of the resurrection this Easter Sunday. 

-Dr. Ben Birdsong 

Missions Minister at Christ Church Birmingham

Writer and Speaker

www.benbirdsong.com

Parenting Points

Kids cannot wait to grow up. From countdowns to the next birthday to dreams of getting out of the house, kids want to rush into adulthood because they believe the grass is greener on the other side. However, the failure of the alluring promises of adulthood is clearly displayed in the popular slogan: “I can’t adult today.”

Adulting is overrated because with freedom comes the pressure of responsibility. It is fun to spend money however you want but making money to spend is more of an effort than anticipated. It is great to be able to have a family but with family comes the complexities of relationships and raising kids. Adulting comes with the constant challenge to deliver and perform. As adults, we dream of a simpler day and time. We think of our childhood as the glory days, yet we often wish that we could return to that place of rest, and affirmation we experienced as a kid. What if there was a place where we could go back?

When it comes to our faith, we take the performance-driven tools of adulting and seek to apply them to our relationship with Jesus. We launch Bible reading plans to accomplish daily reading habits. We set goals to pray more. We plan on having a daily family devotion with our kids. We commit to being more intentional to serve others. When February comes and our best-made plans are lost to the struggles of real life, where do we turn? Do we double-down our efforts to salvage a mediocre performance? Or do we realize Jesus didn’t call us to perform for Him but simply to be with Him? “See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are” (1 John 3:1 ESV). The invitation from Jesus is to become a child again- to experience His love. We can crawl like a little child into the lap of our loving Father to draw deeper into our relationship with Him. God’s love for us is not based on our efforts, but Jesus’ effort for us at the cross.

As beloved children, we can lay down the pressure to perform. We can set aside the stress of adulting. We can rest in the arms of the One who is true love, and for some indescribable reason, He has decided to shower His love upon us.

–Dr. Ben Birdsong 

Missions Minister at Christ Church Birmingham

Writer and Speaker

www.benbirdsong.com

Parenting Points

Serving as a family is an activity that can both show the power of the gospel through your family and remind you of the sacrifice of Jesus as the Servant who suffered. Taking time to serve is so simple, yet we often miss opportunities around us to serve because we don’t take time to understand what great things God could do in and through our families when we serve.

Serving others reflects the Gospel. Serving others stands at the heart of the message of the gospel. As people who follow Jesus, we should be people who are willing to serve others and love them as we follow a Savior who came to serve us by going to the cross for our sin. Our service reflects the heart of Jesus who came “not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Mark 10:45 ESV).

Serving others reorients our priorities. Through service, your family is also invited to put their needs to the side to serve and care for others. For people who so easily get consumed by our own needs and wants, it is good for us to be reminded of how Jesus and His kingdom defines greatness: “the greatest among you shall be your servant” (Matthew 23:11 ESV). Serving realigns your family to kingdom priorities.

Serving others allows us to discover and use our gifts. By using our gifts and talents to serve others, we determine what gifts, talents, and passions God has given us and the Holy Spirit has empowered us with. As we use our gifts, we are “good stewards of God’s varied grace” as we “serve by the strength that God supplies” (1 Peter 4:10-11 ESV). God gives us strength and shows us that we can be His hands and feet to serve others in the world.

Serving others displays the glory of God. When we see God’s work in our own gifts being given to serve others, we can only point the credit to the One who truly deserves it. We serve “in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ” (1 Peter 4:11 ESV).

As you begin the new year as a family, take time to be intentional to plan time to serve others as a family. You will be amazed at how your service displays the gospel, changes your perspective, leads you to discover your gifts, and brings glory to God.

-Dr. Ben Birdsong 

Missions Minister at Christ Church Birmingham

Writer and Speaker

www.benbirdsong.com

Parenting Points

Every year, it seems like the anticipation for Christmas gets earlier and earlier. The Halloween candy is quickly replaced by the unending stock of Christmas décor. Our culture longs for Christmas with all its pomp and circumstance, yet we often miss the greater longing which Christmas is meant to invite us to experience.

In the middle of Luke’s retelling of the Christmas story, we meet two minor characters who show the heart of longing which Christmas should plant deep within our souls. Simeon and Anna (Luke 2:22-38) have both spent years at the temple praying and hoping for the Messiah to come. Simeon has been promised that his weary eyes will behold the Son of God before he passes into eternity. Anna came daily to the temple to fast and pray that God would send His Rescuer. 

The faithfulness of clinging to a promise yet to be realized kept Simeon and Anna going day by day. As time ticked by, it would have been easy for them to think God had forgotten about them, that their prayers were hitting the ceiling of the temple, and that their fasting was in vain. Simeon and Anna were sustained by the truth that God is faithful, and His character is unchanging. They had been longing for “the redemption of Jerusalem” (Luke 2:38 ESV), and finally, Mary and Joseph walk into the temple with the promised Jesus. The answer to their prayers unfolds before their weary eyes. When we come to Christmas, we are left with a longing as well. Jesus has purchased our redemption at the cross and paved the way for us to have new life in Him, yet we long for the day that Jesus will return to bring restoration to all things.

The Christmas season has been termed a season of advent or “waiting.” We gather to celebrate Jesus coming the first time while also looking for the moment when He will come again to “make all things new” (Revelation 21:5 ESV). Restoration is just over the horizon and our anticipation of celebrating Jesus’ first coming should not overshadow our longing to experience His second. This year’s Christmas, like countless years before, will be disappointing. The anticipation and excitement in our hearts cannot be fulfilled by celebration. It results in an advent longing which should drive us to prayer, fasting, waiting, and longing. Come Lord Jesus, your people are waiting and ready.

-Dr. Ben Birdsong 

Missions Minister at Christ Church Birmingham

Writer and Speaker

www.benbirdsong.com

Parenting Points

As we gather around the turkey, dressing, green beans, mashed potatoes with brown gravy, and the warm rolls, our immediate temptation is to rush into eating. Thanksgiving stands as one of the greatest meals of the calendar year, yet it is easy for us to rapidly move into activity and miss the spiritual significance of the day – the blessing of family, the remembrance of a faithful God, and the worshipful response of thanks and praise to Him.

In Psalms 100, King David writes a psalm for giving thanks, which is worth reading before you dive into the desserts. In Psalm 100:4-5, David writes: “Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise! Give thanks to him; bless his name! For the Lord is good; his steadfast love endures forever, and his faithfulness to all generations.” From these verses we see three truths for a Thanksgiving season:

1. The Blessing of Family. David writes of “all generations.” Throughout the Old Testament, we read stories of generations of people who have sought to follow God. We see the highs and lows, successes and failures, and good times and bad times. These stories remind us of the stories from older generations as they share their own stories around our Thanksgiving table. As stories are shared around the dinner table, let us remember we are a part of a story bigger than us and our family.

2. The Remembrance of a Faithful God. David calls his readers to praise because God is “good” and “his steadfast love endures forever.” The Old Testament stories speak of a God who is with and for His people. Throughout this year, we have seen His same faithful hand at work in our lives and our families. As our stories are shared, do we recount of how God has been faithful to us and to our family?

3. The Worshipful Response of Thanks and Praise. We have many reasons to give thanks and praise, as David writes. God is faithful to us. God has provided for us. God has rescued us in Jesus. God has brought our families safely together to respond to Him in praise. 

This Thanksgiving, will your day be simply marked by a turkey coma, or will your family join with David and the saints through the ages to praise and thank the God who is worthy?

-Dr. Ben Birdsong 

Missions Minister at Christ Church Birmingham

Writer and Speaker

www.benbirdsong.com