Lessons Learned at Big Oak Ranch

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Darrah family

Miracle Moments

Brought to you by: Molly Maid of Birmingham, www.mollymaid.com/birmingham

“Heal me, Lord, and I will be healed; save me and I will be saved, for You are the one I praise.” Jeremiah 17:14 

My mother was abused as a child, and throughout her struggles, she developed a mental illness that was not diagnosed or treated until very late in life. It presented difficulties in her relationships and there was significant instability in my life. 

Grey and Kaysi Darrah
Grey Darrah is seen here with his wife Kaysi.

I didn’t have a consistent father figure or role model and was in desperate need of guidance. I became one of the first few boys to live at Big Oak and moved into John and Tee’s home along with the other boys. Living at the Ranch provided me the stability and security I needed to find my purpose and put my focus on positive growth in my life. During such important developmental years, I found the father figure I needed, I realized what family means and was shown such love and respect from John and Tee. 

Darrah family
Grey and Kaysi Darrah have been married for 39 years and have three children and six grandchildren.

As I transitioned out of the Ranch, I knew from what I learned at Big Oak that I wanted to build a solid marriage, to be a great father to my future children and to center it all on Jesus. My wife Kaysi and I will soon celebrate our 39th wedding anniversary. We have three grown children and six grandchildren. Our children are saved, have thriving families, and are raising their children in Christian homes. We always strived to parent in the way God was leading and I am so thankful for the great role models I had in John and Tee. 

In addition, not only did my mother become whole again, healthy and regretful of the past, I found healing too. I now have the opportunity to capture family legacies through my portrait studio in Cartersville, Ga., Darrah Photo, which is in its 20th year. At 61, I look back on my life and I’m so grateful for my time at Big Oak – for the legacy that extends throughout my family. I have nothing but great memories of living there and am happy to know so many kids have been given the same chance I was given so many years ago.

-Grey Darrah

Miracle Moments

 

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Hands Of Love. The Sun Is Our Power.

Parenting Points

In February, as love takes center stage with Valentine’s Day, let’s embark on a different kind of celebration—a celebration of kindness. Imagine a February where every day is an opportunity for your family to spread love through acts of kindness, both big and small. This month, let’s challenge ourselves and our families to make kindness a daily habit, reflecting the love that Jesus has shown us.

The Kindness Challenge is simple and powerful. Each day, commit as a family to performing an act of kindness for someone else. It could be a family member, a friend, a neighbor, or even a stranger. The goal is to spread the love of Jesus to others intentionally. Here are 10 acts of kindness ideas.

  • Write Encouraging Notes: Take the time to write notes of encouragement and leave them where others can find them.
  • Bake and Share Treats: Whip up some homemade treats and share them with your neighbors or coworkers.
  • Offer Help: Extend a helping hand to someone in need. You could help with groceries, chores, or any other task.
  • Compliment Freely: Be intentional to compliment those around you. A sincere compliment can brighten someone’s day.
  • Donate to Charity: Clean your closets and donate items to a local charity. It’s a great way to declutter while helping those in need.
  • Random Acts of Kindness: Perform random acts of kindness, like paying for someone’s coffee or leaving small surprises for family members.
  • Visit the Elderly: Spend time with elderly neighbors or residents at a local nursing home. Your company can be a source of joy.
  • Express Gratitude: Write thank-you notes to people who have positively impacted your life.
  • Volunteer as a Family: Dedicate a day to volunteer as a family. It’s a wonderful way to bond while giving back to the community.
  • Listen with Intent: Practice active listening. Give your full attention when someone is speaking and respond with kindness and empathy.

The Kindness Challenge cultivates a spirit of love and compassion in your family. As Christians, our faith teaches us the importance of love and kindness. Jesus, the embodiment of love, calls us to love our neighbors as ourselves (Matthew 22:39). By making kindness a daily practice, we emulate Christ’s teachings and contribute to creating a more compassionate and loving community. The ripple effect of such intentional acts of kindness extends beyond February, leaving a lasting impact on those around us.

Ben Birdsong-Dr. Ben Birdsong 

Missions Minister at Christ Church Birmingham 

Writer and Speaker

www.benbirdsong.com

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Coco Chanel 1

The Family Pet

Coco Chanel is a senior, brindle with both beauty and brains. Due to no fault of her own, she found herself in the care of Two by Two Animal Rescue and has been trying to ensnare the perfect family ever since, but she’s worried that her age is holding her back. Because of this, she wants to remind the general public that age is just a number. Like a fine wine, Coco Chanel has aged very well.

Coco Chanel
You can apply to adopt Coco Chanel at www.twobytworescue.com/adopting.

Over the years she has mastered basic commands like sit, stay, and lay down. She is crate trained, but also completely trustworthy enough to leave out on her own while you’re away. In her younger years, she may have committed the crime of snooping through your things when left unattended, but those days are long behind her. These days, she’d much rather take a nap or catch up on her soap operas. 

She’s been in foster care with all kinds of people and has yet to stumble across a person she does not like. However, she does detest the company of certain other dogs, mainly the ones who lack manners and think they can simply galivant into her personal space. Coco requires formal introductions and prefers that other dogs respect her like the icon she is. Treat bribery is encouraged. 

Two by Two is a faith based, no kill rescue whose mission is to give life to abandoned, abused, stray, and distressed animals. Saving animal lives for more than 20 years, Two by Two operates out of Birmingham, Alabama, and has coordinated the rescue and adoption of cats, dogs, horses, and even a few pot-bellied pigs. Two by Two has placed dogs in almost forty states and even a few abroad! To learn more about Two by Two visit www.twobytworescue.com. † 

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Kodi Lee on stage

Music Notes

Experience the musical talents of America’s Got Talent (AGT) Season 14 Winner and Golden Buzzer recipient Kodi Lee as he takes the stage for his first performance in the Southeast on February 29, 2024.

Kodi Lee on stage
When competing on America’s Got Talent Season 14, Lee performed the popular Christian song, “I Can Only Imagine.”

Beginning at 7 p.m., Disability Rights & Resources (DRR) is bringing Lee to Birmingham for an evening full of music and inspiration. DRR is a community-supported, 501(c)(3) dedicated to empowering people with disabilities to fully participate in the community. The organization encourages people with disabilities to support one another in reaching their own independent living goals. Proceeds from the Kodi Lee show will help DRR establish the organization’s first fully ADA-equipped Next Step Resource Center. 

Lee is a 26-year-old musical prodigious savant – one of only around 25 in the world. With over 432 million views and counting online, his Golden Buzzer performance became the most viral audition in AGT history, leading him to win the entire season. Lee’s incredible talent and inspirational journey serve as a powerful reminder that disabilities don’t have to be barriers to achieving one’s dreams. Since he was a very young child, music has been a huge part of Lee’s life.

Kodi Lee headshot
Hear Kodi Lee live at the Boutwell Auditorium, 1930 Reverend Abraham Woods Jr Boulevard, Birmingham, 35203, on February 29, 2024 starting at 7 p.m.

His passion and love for music and performing has only grown stronger through the years, shaping him into the person he is today. Lee is also blind and autistic, which has presented many other challenges in life. But it has never held him back from his dreams, playing the piano, singing and performing in front of thousands of fans. Being a prodigious savant has given him a photographic memory with music. His range of music is endless, ranging from R&B, soul, hip hop, rock and roll, pop, country, oldies, alternative and classical. 

“Kodi Lee’s heartwarming story and remarkable music talent have captured the hearts of people worldwide, and his performance at Boutwell Auditorium is sure to be an unforgettable celebration of resilience and determination,” said DRR Chief Executive Officer John Roper. “We are excited to see what Kodi does for our community outreach and our Next Step Resource Center! We believe independent living is based upon great peer relationships and principles of integration, consumer control, cross-disability and equal access…” The purpose of the Resource Center is to show the capabilities of a home that supports independent living. DRR aims to encourage and foster the hope for the future of people with disabilities to be able to live independently. To learn more and buy tickets to A Musical Evening with Kodi Lee, visit www.drradvocates.org/kodi-lee-live. †

 

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Trudy Cathy White

Special Feature

How can you leave a legacy that lasts? Trudy Cathy White, daughter of Chick-fil-A founder Truett Cathy, will explore this question and more on February 14, 2024 at the Samford University Legacy League’s Scholarship Luncheon. This annual event raises funds for students facing challenging financial needs. 

As a Samford University graduate, White welcomes any opportunity to return to her alma mater. “Samford is especially important to me because I met my husband, John, there in Birmingham while he was a student and I operated our local Chick-fil-A restaurant in Central Plaza Mall,” she says, adding, “I’m honored to have been invited back by the Legacy League to share at the upcoming luncheon.” 

Trudy Cathy White
Trudy Cathy White and her husband John have four children and 17 grandchildren. “All of our adult children and grandchildren moved back to the Atlanta area, so we have treasured the opportunity to attend school plays, sport tournaments, and dance recitals,” she says.

White is the author of four books including her latest release, A Legacy that Lasts: Preserving and Transferring Your Family Values. White shares that the Lord first placed writing this book on her heart nearly ten years ago after her parents, Truett and Jeanette Cathy, passed away just 10 months apart. “As the only daughter, much of the task of cleaning through my parents’ earthly possessions fell to me,” she says. Through laughter, tears, and memories, “I began to realize the greatest inheritance my parents left me was not physical or monetary… it was their legacy. The life they had lived.” She explains that this experience caused her and her husband to evaluate and alter how they spent their time, how they parented, and more. White adds that she began speaking on this topic and John encouraged her to write a book about it in order to share the lessons they learned and the tools they discovered. 

At the Scholarship Luncheon, White will dive into some of the tools she and John discovered for leaving a legacy. “To use a Chick-fil-A analogy… I’ll share a full eight count at the luncheon,” she shares, adding, “I’ll go deeper into some of the tools John and I have used to preserve and transfer our family values and share some fun stories along the way.” White encourages anyone to attend the Legacy Luncheon to also hear the encouraging testimonies from students whose lives have been impacted by the Legacy League. “The last luncheon I attended brought me to tears hearing directly from the students who would otherwise be unable to attend college, let alone a private school like Samford,” White says. 

The Scholarship Luncheon begins at 11:30 a.m. at a country club in Vestavia. To learn more about the scholarship program and to make lunch reservations, visit www.samford.edu/legacyleague.

Read more about Trudy Cathy White’s family and faith here. Get her recipe for Mountain Dew Apple Dumplings here.

-Melissa Armstrong

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bigstock Multiracial Couple In Love Mar 475559785

Special Feature

Are you motivated to get rid of items you no longer need or want? You know the plan. Assess what you have and divide it into three categories—give away, throw away, and keep. 

Have you thought about steps you can take to get rid of marital clutter and develop an ongoing habit of discarding and organizing? This approach to marital reorganization will benefit your emotional and physical health and your family’s well-being. This process involves careful inspection of your marriage as you repair the unappealing areas. Now is a great time to start implementing a marriage maintenance plan. Author Harriet Schechter says, “…clutter actually represents a visible manifestation of uninvested maintenance time.” Going forward, let Christ Jesus, your Savior, help you remove the disarray. Implement a divine system that works and will last! Be ruthless when you remove the destructive baggage. 

What to Throw Away:

  • Poor communication
  • Anger
  • Rudeness
  • Bitterness
  • Selfishness
  • Disrespect
  • Lack of love and attention

Is it obvious from an organizational viewpoint that Christ is the head of your marriage? Taking the right actions to spiritually organize your marriage and home will make a lasting difference. 

What to Keep:

  • Prayer in your marriage
  • Growth in your personal relationship with Christ Jesus
  • Corporate church gatherings and worship with your spouse
  • Faithfulness to each other
  • Physical affection
  • Healthy communication

What to Give Away: 

  • Respect for one another 
  • Goodness, gentleness, and patience
  • Forgiveness 
  • Kind words
  • Love with words and actions
  • Thankfulness to God and your spouse

Choose to remain encouraged if you are progressing slower than you would prefer. Work on one area at a time just as you would one room at a time. Hebrews 12:1 KJV says, “…lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us.” Eliminate the negative and unnecessary things in your relationship that prevent you from living as a godly spouse. Follow Christ. When you do, it will become easier to remove the disorder and watch your marriage transform and become healthy. 

Trust the Lord to provide marital direction and order. He will fill the cleared spaces with His love and peace!

-Vanessa Jones

Vice President & Co-founder of Biblical Marriage Institute

BiblicalMarriageInstitute.org

@biblicalmarriageinstitute

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bigstock Intermittent Fasting Healthy 363268048

Here’s to Your Health

There are many different opinions on how often we should eat a meal nowadays. Should we eat three times a day, six times a day, or should we do fasting? I believe that depending on your goals your routine for eating may look different. Just because something works for someone else doesn’t mean that will work for you. I do believe that there is one principle for eating that we as Christians can implement specific to our routine that is Biblical and also good for our body. It is called fasting. We must understand the Biblical principle of fasting and how it can be a great practice for us physically and Spiritually.

The first thing to understand is that there are times for fasting and times for feasting. Fasting and feasting at the right time is key to living in balance. We tend to feast all of the time. We are continually eating and celebrating. Don’t get me wrong, I love celebration and I LOVE good food. There is nothing wrong with feasting as long as it is at the right time. Feasting and fasting balance each other in such a great way and can be used to benefit our health. In Luke 5: 33-35, Jesus is questioned about why his disciples do not fast. Fasting was very common back in those days and was often done in a legalistic way so that the participant could look more spiritual to others. Jesus replies to these questions by asking a question, “Can you make the friends of the bridegroom fast while the bridegroom is with them? But the days will come when the bridegroom will be taken away from them; then they will fast in those days.” Jesus explains that there is a time for fasting and a time for feasting. If we do each of these in the right timing, there will be great joy and reward.

When you feast, make your feasting about others. Whether it’s enjoying something someone made you, or making something you know someone else will enjoy, use feasting as a way to bring people together, instead of making it primarily about ourselves and getting what we want.

Fasting can be a tremendous asset to our lives. The biblical principle of fasting is throughout the bible. Not only is it good for our spirit, it turns out that there is a massive benefit to our health as well. Historically, our ancestors have fasted for thousands of years, many of them by necessity. Our bodies’ ability to store up energy for later has been a key in how humans have survived throughout history. We have not always had an abundant supply of food like we do in America. People had to fast until they could find and kill their next meal. Now current studies are showing us all of the benefits that fasting can bring to our body. Fasting can help give our digestive system a rest so that it can process food efficiently. It can help our bodies be efficient at regulating blood sugar by making sure we are not insensitive to insulin and glucagon, which means no more blood sugar crashes. Fasting can even help us fight sickness by making sure all of our energy goes to keeping us healthy instead of continually digesting food.

Overall, fasting is a tool that God has given us. It may be helpful to try implementing intermittent fasting into your weekly routine once or twice. Do your research to find a routine that will work for you and your goals and always make sure to check with your doctor to make sure you are being safe! 

-Ashton Tate, founder

Glory to Glory Fitness

www.glorytogloryfitness.com

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The Ranch

Are We There Yet?

You can escape to the beautiful mountains of Pigeon Forge, Tenn. with Your Home Away From Home. Whether you are looking for a cabin to host a Christian retreat, a family reunion, or a getaway, there are eight cabins to choose from perfect for any sized group. Here is a peek inside a few of the cabins.

The BeehiveThe Beehive. This cute and cozy one-bedroom unit might be smaller but it’s full of character. With comfortable furniture and décor buzzing with cuteness, guests will relax as soon as they open the door. This unit is located inside Tanner Manor Lodge set on 12 acres waiting for guests to get out in nature and explore. The Beehive sleeps 2 guests comfortably. 

The RanchThe Ranch. This larger unit, located inside of Tanner Manor Lodge, sleeps 8 guests with 4 bedrooms and 2 1/2 bathrooms. The Ranch offers unique inside surroundings including a beautiful rock wall. Guests are welcome to hike around 12 acres and soak in the beauty of God’s creation. There is even a conveniently located picnic table and grill in case guests want to dine surrounded by nature, while foosball and shuffleboard are inside along with an 85″ TV and two living rooms.

Kissing the CloudsKissing the Clouds. This tranquil cabin, nestled in the Smokies, offers stunning views of the mountains. This cabin sleeps 4 guests and has a wood-burning fireplace. The amazing view from the wraparound balcony is a great place to relax. On a day with clouds in the valley, guests will discover why the cabin is called Kissing the Clouds. 

The LoftThe Loft. Kick back and relax in this stylish cabin perfect for a romantic getaway, honeymoon, anniversary, or a small family of 4 looking for a retreat from the normal life at home. This cabin has a wood-burning fireplace, a hot tub, and a wraparound balcony with breathtaking views. Occasionally, guests may have visitors including wild turkeys, raccoons, squirrels, and more. 

February code for Your Home Away From Home CabinsKathryn Tanner, who owns the Your Home Away From Home cabins with her husband Wendell, shares that they envision the property being used for Christian retreats, family reunions, destination weddings, and getaways. The cabins have been rented by a variety of groups each year including Christian couple’s getaways, Sunday School retreats, Christian college groups, and church youth groups. A Christian Writer’s Group, called Investive Writer’s Retreat, is already booked for April 25-28 and still has availability to join. You can call 530-392-2365 to learn more about this retreat. The Tanners have also welcomed a Women’s Mission Group called People of Praise, Cumberland Presbyterian Church groups, and missionaries on furlough. Learn more about these cabins, plus a condo in Gulf Shores, at cabins.tannermanor.org. †

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February giveaways

TO SAY THANK YOU for reading and supporting the businesses and organizations that advertise with Birmingham Christian Family(BCF) and make spreading Good News possible we have THREE Great Giveaways this month!

Enter to win TICKETS to the Birmingham Home Show February 16-18, 2024 at the BJCC, www.birminghamshomeshow.com. 3 Winners, 2 Tickets Each!

To enter simply LIKE and COMMENT on the Giveaway Post on Birmingham Christian Family’s Facebook @Birmingham Christian Family.

Birmingham Home Show logoFor EXTRA ENTRIES:

Offer ends Thursday, 2/8/24. Winners will be announced 2/9/24 on the Facebook Giveaway Post. So be sure to FOLLOW our Facebook page @birminghamchristianfamily.

Enter to win TICKETS to an evening of laughter, wisdom and a dose of honesty from Harrison Scott Key Author of “How to Stay Married,” February 24, 2024 at Samford University presented by Tactical Faith, www.tacticalfaith.com/events.

Harrison Scott Key2 Winners, 2 Tickets Each! To enter simply LIKE and COMMENT on the Giveaway Post on Birmingham Christian Family’s Facebook @Birmingham Christian Family.

For EXTRA ENTRIES:

Offer ends Thursday 2/15/24. Winners will announced Friday 2/16/24 on the Facebook Giveaway Post. So be sure to FOLLOW our Facebook page @birminghamchristianfamily.

Enter to win TICKETS to Cottontails Village March 1-3, 2024 at the BJCC, www.cottontailsfestival.com. 3 Winners, 2 Tickets Each!

Cottontail's VillageTo enter simply LIKE and COMMENT on the Giveaway Post on Birmingham Christian Family’s Instagram @cfpbirmingham. 

For EXTRA ENTRIES:

Offer ends Thursday 2/22/24. Winners announced 2/23/24 on Instagram so be sure to FOLLOW our Instagram page @cfpbirmingham.

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bigstock Multiracial Group Of Carefree 383370884

Here’s to your Health

Brought to you by: Community Partner Compact, www.compact2020.com

Community Partner 25 YearsDid you know big things are happening in the brain during adolescence and that the brain isn’t fully developed until the mid-twenties? Studies show that adolescence is a unique phase in development in which the reward center of the brain is more active or tends to shout louder than the logical portion. The logical portion is the front part of the brain called the pre-frontal cortex. It is one of the last brain regions to mature. This area is responsible for skills like planning, prioritizing, and controlling impulses. The reward or pleasure-seeking portion of the brain is what tends to take charge in the teenage years- especially during stressful times. Because the logical skills are still developing and the reward center takes a lead in decision making, teens are more likely to engage in risky behaviors or make decisions without considering the potential results. 

Anxiety Vulnerability. According to the National Institutes of Health, nearly one in three of all adolescents will experience an anxiety disorder. According to the CDC, anxiety is at its highest in youth between 12 to 17 years old. These numbers have been on the rise for many years. Hospital admissions for suicidal teenagers have more than doubled over the past decade. Due to the big changes the brain is undergoing during these years, teens are more vulnerable to issues with emotion regulation such as anxiety and depression. Be aware of the potential signs of anxiety including:

  • Recurring fears and worries
  • Changes in behavior
  • Avoiding activities, school or social interactions
  • Dropping grades 
  • Trouble sleeping

It is important to talk with teens about potential stressors and help them keep perspective and find ways to cope.

Drug Vulnerability. As a teen’s brain develops, drugs can damage the way they process experiences. The specific effect depends on the type of drug being used. There are three main categories of drugs- each with a different set of effects on the brain. 

1. Stimulants: Cause teen brains to produce an unnatural amount of energy causing heart racing, rising body temperature, and fast breathing. 

2. Depressants: Cause decrease in energy, slows breathing and heart rates, and lowers body temperature. 

3. Hallucinogens: Affect the brain’s perception of reality. Teens that use them can have delusional thoughts. 

The good news is that the brain is ready to learn. It can change, adapt, and react to the environment. It is resilient and responds quickly to treatment. For more information, visit Facebook @Compact2020 or call 205-605-1827. To read more articles like this, visit www.BirminghamChristian.com/COMPACT. †

Did you know COMPACT offers free prevention, intervention, and education for Shelby County students and parents on difficult topics and issues like substance misuse, truancy, behavioral issues, and more? Click to fill out a referral form.

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