She has been robbed and abandoned by the side of the road. She is wounded. She doesn’t feel worthy of love and rejects it when it is offered. How could she respect someone who would love someone “like her?” She feels alone and insignificant. She never forgets. She lives with the pain that seeps up, but she has become the master of pushing those feelings down. They are always below the surface. She must protect herself from further hurt. It is just too painful to talk about or admit. Her heart hurts. “And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”
She comes in with much fear and trepidation. Can she really deal with all those emotions that make her feel like she is going crazy? She knows it is all her fault; she made the decision, and she knows the worse sin to commit is to take the life of her own child. She is tormented. There is no peace. She must take this step and move forward. She must. She is greeted at the doors with hugs from women who have made the same choice. It amazes her how they can say the word abortion and not break down in tears. They are so strong. How can that be? Can she be like that, too?
She comes into the meeting and sees a beautiful table set before her with decorations and lit candles. In her seat is a card that says, “You have been prayed for…” along with a piece of chocolate. She feels underserving of any of these gestures. Then she is invited to have a meal with the group. She has been invited to the banquet. She must try to help pay for her meal or at least clean up, but she is not permitted. She has never actually been treated with such kindness. Her guard begins to go down as she begins to see she is accepted, just as she is. The fear of judgment is alleviating.
The meal reminds her of the communion meal with Jesus and the love and laughter at the table is a refreshing escape from the constant gnawing feelings she battles every day. She begins to warm up to this small group. When the meeting begins, she is amazed at the stories of these brave women! She can’t believe they have lived similar lifestyles! The don’t “look like” they had abortions!
And so, the healing begins as the love flows. She has found the ones who refused to walk past her. She has found the ones who know what she is going through and because of their love, she is going to be pointed to the One who heals. She is going to be healed and she is going to be made whole. Abortion Recovery Alabama hosts free, caring, confidential, non-judgmental small group Bible studies. Learn more at www.abortionrecoveryalabama.org.