Brought to you by: Community Partner Bradford & Holliman
If your mom or grandmom is of a certain vintage, they likely do not need sweets to derail their diets or knickknacks to complicate their dusting for Mother’s Day next month. So, what is a devoted child or grandchild to do?
Ask questions about her life before you or your mother were born or about her parents and grandparents. The stories are just as important as the DNA you have inherited.
Ask if she wants to have the last word about her funeral or burial plans. One grandmother who lived to be over 100 updated her draft obituary every 5 years or so for about 20 years because she knew she could draft it best… and could edit out what she did not want to be shared! One grandmother had a granddaughter take notes on pastors, hymns, Bible passages, and showed her the fancy Eastern Star evening gown she wanted to wear. That grandmother also said she expected a good turnout!
If your mom is facing downsizing, encourage her to pass along precious memorabilia now, so that she can receive the appreciation now. Do not wait to put it in a will. Help her with spring cleaning such as sifting through what paperwork to keep for taxes and posterity and what to shred. By running the shredder, you can protect her from accidentally exposing important personal data that fraudsters and scammers could use. If her husband was a veteran, make sure she saves all military records in case she needs to apply for veteran benefits. Talk to her about simplifying financial affairs into fewer accounts. Her executor will bless you.
Know who is part of her personal affairs team- accountant, financial advisers, doctors, and estate planning attorney- and make sure they have the paperwork they need to support her. One adult daughter and her elderly mother strengthened their relationship by organizing papers for taxes together each early spring. Not only did it educate the daughter about her mother’s affairs, but interesting family stories came up. Your presence and attention are the best gifts you can give moms and grandmothers.
Partner at Bradford & Holliman
Estate Planning, Trusts & Special Needs
No representation is made that the quality of the legal service to be performed is greater than the quality of service performed by other lawyers.